Wrote this in January, 2010.
For the past three years, Death has looked me squarely in the eyes on a regular basis. Multiple lung collapses and surgeries, drug addiction and all of the associated problems, seizure and/or severe migraine problems, problems procuring money and shelter.
Right now I’m laying in bed with a nasty cold and mourning the loss of a Reese’s Dark Chocolate Peanutbutter Cup that I can’t eat. You see, I’m extremely sensitive to caffeine; even as little as 20 milligrams will cause me to have seizure-like symptoms (including passing out) within an hour. It just so happens that a serving of dark chocolate contains approximately 30 mg of caffeine.
I was reading posts by people with epilepsy while researching how caffeine acts as a seizure (and migraine, in some people) trigger, and noticed that a lot of people describe their symptoms as having progressed significantly throughout the time they’ve had their disease. Likewise, whatever symptoms I’ve been experiencing have progressed over the past couple years.
This led me to think about my time here and how little of it there might be. Continue Reading…