you mentioned that

“Thelemites have methods for discovering their True Will, but it is a lot of work.”

Can you give me an example of one or two?

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Best of luck in your endeavour to get clean! The task is not easy, but it is well worth it.

Thelema has aided my recovery in many ways. In the last few months of my addiction, I felt like I was unworthy to call myself a Thelemite as long as I continued to allow a chemical to be my master. I used my sense of self identity (as a Thelemite) as a strong motivating force for persisting through withdrawals. Thelema is, after all, “the law of the strong.”

Additionally, being a member of OTO was invaluable. During my initial withdrawal, I drew upon the strengths I perceived in each of my brethren. I cultivated a desire to be as strong as they were in various aspects, and used that as another motivating force.

As you may know, Thelema is a spiritual philosophy which comes with the understanding that beauty and strength come from within us, as opposed to being some outside and separate force. The traditional view in recovery is that we are weak, can’t quit on our own, need to surrender to a higher power, etc. People sit around at NA regretting their mistakes, talking about how “lucky we are to have NA.” The way I see it, addiction is a wonderful opportunity to cultivate the strength inherent within yourself. You are overcoming, conquering your enemy, and ultimately developing a very strong sense of will.

Remember also that strength is in unity. If you are unable to quit on your own, there is no weakness or shame in asking for help. Have a friend restrain you, if necessary, so you can’t get to where you keep your pills. As you can see from your addiction, freedom is found neither in being able to do whatever you want, nor in being restricted involuntarily. True freedom is found in voluntary limitation; acting in accordance with your true will or what is right for you.

While quitting, I recommend you reflect on positive qualities like the enormous strength you have for pushing through the withdrawal phase. Think about the knowledge you gained by going through the addiction experience, and realize that this can have an overall beneficial effect. Draw on the strengths of others around you. Think about the last time you saw someone hold their ground even when temptation was unbearable. Draw on my strengths if necessary. I’m another Thelemite and I overcame this and am still clean. I’m no stronger than you are; I fell into an addiction just the same. You can be just as strong as me, if not stronger!

Check out another post I put on this site called “Addiction #1: Slaying Dragons”. This might also help provide some inspiration.

Once the initial withdrawal is over, you need to watch out for the post-acute withdrawal phase. This article helped me a *lot* with that: http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=73599

I’m three months clean but I’m still dealing with intense cravings and some annoying restlessness. Dedicating myself to the Work is a great distraction. I’ve also been strength training (working out with weights) for about an hour every two days, and that cuts the restlessness down to almost nothing. Did you know studies show that working out regularly is as effective in anxiety/depression as taking antidepressants?

Finally, it may interest you to know that I’m writing a recovery program which is intended to provide a Thelemic alternative to AA/NA meetings. Once I have a decent initial draft, I’ll be posting it on this site.

Good luck, and feel free to comment more if you need anything else.

Love is the law, love under will.